Social Interactions

Sometimes you think you get it, other times definitely not.

· What does this text mean?

· Are they actually fine?

· Did I share too much?

Navigating social cues and dynamics with the neurotypical is really hard. If you’ve ever felt like you’re not on the same page with some people, this is literally what we’re here for. We want to help you better connect with everyone so you can make a new friend, get into a new relationship, or something in between.

Texting

We’re all in front of screens in some way, shape, or form throughout the day. In fact, I’m writing this on a screen while another screen is playing a T.V. show that used to be on (Boy Meets World if you were curious)

The digital world, like the in-person world, has rules and norms, and you should learn about some of them if you’re going to be successful in getting to know people better. Here are a couple that you should try to follow, especially with things like texting.

1. Ok is actually not Ok

Now, that might not make sense to you, but let me explain. While saying OK while talking to people in person is perfectly fine and a normal response, if you say that via text it can come off as dismissive or unenthusiastic. Try replacing that with a “sounds good” which could be seen as more positive.

2. Less is more

When you’re texting with a person, they shouldn’t feel like they’re reading a book from you. If you feel like you have a lot that you want to say to a person at a certain moment, that’s what calling is for. Try to keep your messages to 3 or 4 sentences so you can get out what you have to say, but still keep it so it doesn’t take up someone's whole screen.

3. Timing is everything.

I’ve been there; the meme is perfect, you know they will like that video but it’s 2am…

Save it until tomorrow and send it during a time you know they’ll be up and will enjoy it.

Face-to-face interactions

If you’re going to make friends or be in a relationship, you’re gonna have to be in front of people. This is trickier than online interactions, so let’s jump right in

1. How are you? does not always equal How are you?

You’re probably reading this and thinking I’m making no sense, but hear me out

More often than not, people in public settings are polite but not necessarily kind. When you meet someone new, saying everything that you want to say can be off-putting. Until you get to know a person start simple with something like “I’m doing well, how are you doing”

2. Did I make this awkward?

Sometimes awkward moments happen even with the best of intentions, but here are some social cues you should look out for:

· The listener stops asking follow-up questions

· looks away,

· shifts their body away from you.

· Glancing at their phone or watch

If you see any of these, that’s probably a sign that you might’ve made things awkward. You can rebound, but if this does happen, you’re better off changing subjects.

3. Wait... are we done?

You said goodbye. They said goodbye. So why are you both still standing there? And now, do you hug, shake hands, wave? How do you know which to do?

Generally, a handshake is more formal. Let’s say you’re meeting someone for the first time, in a work setting, or somewhere professional, like a networking event. A hug is usually reserved for people you're closer to, like friends or family but even then, how do you do the hug?

If you do end up in a hug, how do you know when to let go? Watch for the grip loosening, when a hug goes from firm to barely there, that's your cue. Or a slight lean back, their body pulling away before their arms do. Simple signs, but in the moment? Easier said than done.

Social dynamics are tough to figure out for anyone; going over everything would take us years. This is the first part of your journey and we’ll be with you for every step